You’re perfection, you’re an angel
You can do no wrong.
You can pretend that it’s all okay
When you knew the truth all along.
They say karma bites people when they least expect.
They say what goes around comes around
I don’t deny that I’m not perfect
but I admit when I am bound.
It’s easier to pawn your mistakes off on others.
Easier to say it was her and not me.
It’s easier for you to lay fault not in yourself
but the vision of truth will always be.
You say you don’t take issue in the fact that I am who I am.
You say that I should change then change your mind again
You say that I’m still the same person I was so long ago.
I’d say you’re the same but I can see the decline for myself.
You can do no wrong.
You are sheer perfection.
I will sit and await your lies
I will wait for this injection!
Lay fault not in the eyes of others
but lay fault when your to blame.
Fix your mistakes and fix your errors
before it all becomes too late.
You say that you don’t get it.
You say that you don’t see.
but if you look at the reflection in the mirror
You’ll see what I’ve always seen.
They walk through the hallways hidden.
Eyes down to the ground, hoodie covering their face.
They do all they can to be invisible.
They do all the can to go unnoticed throughout the day,
but the inevitable happens.
The first push and the second shove.
Pushed on the ground, papers scattered.
They are the bullied, the beaten, the broken.
They try to comprehend the why but can’t.
A little too different, a little too odd.
The no name brand clothing and the black attire.
The no care attitude, the no friend’s around.
They are the nameless, the nothings, the victims.
They are the pained, the hurt, the retaliaters.
You lay blame in those bullied, in those beat down.
You place fault in the families when it’s your children.
The popular children who beat down the weak.
The rich kids who break the poor.
Unrelenting in their taunting, unrelenting in the abuse.
You lay blame in the bullied for retaliating.
You wonder why? Why did he shoot up the school?
You wonder why he sought revenge in such a final way.
You seek for answers when they stand before you.
Ask your children why he brought a gun to school.
Ask your children why he only attacked the popular kids
Ask your children why he aimed at teachers,
the ones too busy to notice what was there.
Ask your children as to why? Why did he do this?
Ask your children why he killed them all.
Ask your children why he turned the gun on himself
Do not lay blame solely on him.
Do not place blame just on his actions.
Every action has a consequence.
Every action has a repercussion.
So do not lay the blame just on him.
He is at fault for his actions following,
but before then who knows?
Do you think he would have done such a thing
if he hadn’t of been pushed to the ground?
Do you think he would have pulled the trigger
if he was treated like the others?
Ask yourself these questions when you lie awake at night.
Ask yourself these questions when you think your children aren’t to blame.
They’re all to blame. They’re all at fault. Words do more damage then known.
Do not lay blame solely on the attacker because he was attacked once too.
I
There’s the stigmata
that she will never change
she will never be any better
any different
she dives into her pain
alone
she doesn’t ask for help anymore
for fear that she will be named
labelled again
the angry girl
who will never change
II
There’s the stigmata
that she will always
be angry
hateful
vengeful
she’s tired of it all
tired of the whispers
the words behind her back
from friends untrue
she’s tired of the perception
people have of her
she wishes they’d take time
to see her for who
she really is
III
Behind the anger
there’s so much love
behind the hurt
there’s someone so sweet
so kind
so genuine
but they refuse to see
beyond the stigmata
that she will never change
IV
How can she change
when people keep telling ehr
it’s impossible
they keep showing her
keep living in the past
dwelling on mistakes she made
long ago
not letting go of the befores
not focusing on the now
the stigmata lives on
because people aren’t willing
to open their eyes and see
aren’t willing to believe
that change is possible
V
There’s the stigmata
that she will never change
she will never be any better
any different
she dives into her pain
alone
she doesn’t ask for help
anymore
she fears she will be named
labelled again
dubbed the angry girl
and there within her heart
the stigmata remains
the girl who will never
ever
change
Pardon me for my honesty. Pardon me while I sit here for awhile and contemplate my existence. Here is something I wrote while I pondered. Sorry for the brutality of it all.
SHE IS THE GIRL
She is the girl
with cum stained lips
with whore stitched
across her heart
she has dirty knees
from being on the ground
face pressed into the dirt
messed up hair
tears hidden behind her eyes
She is the girl
with bruises on her thighs
with teeth marks everywhere
she always smiles
to the filthy guys
who will do their worst
because that’s all she’s worth
she has a glass heart
and everytime she’s fucked
for pleasure, not for love
another piece breaks off
shattering her perception
that maybe love does exist
beyond the bite marks
beyond the cum stained lips
beyond the fucked up life
she lives…
but there is no love
She is the girl
that every guy goes to
to get off
and walk away
to let off some steam
and get his rocks off
She is the girl
with cum stained lips
with whore stitched
across her heart
she has dirty knees
from being on the ground
face pressed in the dirt
messed up hair
tears hidden behind her eyes
.
.
.
I am the girl.
~2007~
